TORQUE      -  A  Narada Film Review

  MARTIN HENDERSON as Ford   
      &
  ICE T as The Cube    
     
   It doesn't get    
   any better than this.    
     
   MATT SCHULZE,  MONET MAZUR,   
      and JAIME PRESSLY 
   all trying to act as bad   
   as all Hell.
TORQUE - 2004   - Joseph Kahn -Director  &   Neal H Moritz -Producer
    In an astonishing example of precision cookie-cutter film making, TORQUE's Director Joseph Kahn copied everything he possibly could from 2 Fast 2 Furious without actually landing in court on copyright violations.  The only changes this time 'round were kaleidoscopic motorcycles instead of kaleidoscopic Mitsubishis, and they moved from Florida to California.  We viewers were bombarded with the same hyperglitz & sizzle, suicidal testosteronic displays, gratuitous T&A, glaringly faked and impossible road stunts, macho sneer-downs leading to fights, overblown black & white 'respect' scenes, profound immaturity, teen fashion shows, overloud rap and heavy metal bands, glaring product placement and unabated, deafening engine roar.  Under normal circumstances, any one of these ingredients would spell d-e-a-t-h to a film, yet these very things (which should have kept 2 Fast 2 Furious from even being released) have become the necessary ingredients in the emerging sub-genre of "urban hyper-action films".
         Some of the scenes which should guarantee TORQUE's place in the "World's Worst 100 Films" listing cannot be overlooked.  At one point, one motorcycle hits a convenient ramp, sending him skyward.  He lands on top of a speeding passenger train.  A second motorcycle in hot pursuit does the same thing and the chase continues atop the speeding train.  And in the final scene, our antihero Ford jumps onto a $100,000 jet-turbine bike which just happens to be parked there with the keys in it, and blasts off after the baddie.  It is filmed in fast motion in case the cretins in the audience are having a problem understanding the concept of 'going fast'.  The effect is cartoonish - he looks like he's riding a Light Cycle out of the science fiction classic Tron, to include making right-angle, unbanked turns in excess of hundred miles an hour.
         In spite of TORQUE's long list of terminal failings, some credit where it is due:-  The first kudo goes to Ice T: he is in fact an engaging personality.  In this film he does his best to imitate Mr T, and he pulls it off in good style.  Also, the cinematography, when not trying to dazzle us with hokey SFX, got it right a couple of times.
      LEAST Enduring Line or Phrase:  "You want some of this, bitch ?"

Copyright 2004,    Bangkok Eyes / bangkokeyes.com
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