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In The Zone
Bangkok, 01 May 2004 William R. Morledge |
  Rififi's Ghost Returns !
NEW Jap Sex Tours
Rumor Of The Month
May's Follies in review
Soft Kink is Back
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On the streets later than my usual, I went for a massage on Suriwong Road near Thaniya Rd last week, arriving just before 01:00 a.m. When I went in, I asked the masseuse what time they closed. "Two a.m.," she replied in Thai. I asked, in the lingua-franca, why they could stay open until 2:00 a.m. when my regular massage parlor just across the street had just now closed. She replied in plain English, "In the Zone."
"In the Zone", indeed. It was a wake-up call for me for a couple of reasons. The first, although I had heard and read that the 01:00 curfew would be coming into effect in the "non-Zone" areas on 01 April, I had not really been out late enough to witness the early shut-downs, nor had the Press made a definitive announcement of the implementation. I had assumed that the 01:00 a.m. closing had fallen through the cracks, as had the midnite closing plan the month before. Had the 01:00 a.m. closing come into effect without my even noticing? Wow. As none of my acquaintances had mentioned it, I began to wonder whether they even knew about the 01:00 a.m. implementation. (Or was it only me - living in my own little vacuum?) I thought it might be interesting to conduct an official MIDNITE HOUR poll. Guess what? By mid-April, less than ten percent of the people I queried were aware the two-tier curfew had actually been implemented. Others had heard that, for example, Soi Cowboy was closing at 01:00, but they were not sure if it was really true. Note: I was not asking couch potatoes, or Mormons, or nerds - I was asking 'players', those, like myself, who get out and about several times a month to have a quiet, or noisy drink on one of Bangkok's Neon Sois . So, in spite of all the hullabaloo, the protests, and rants over the preceding months from virtually everyone, almost no one was aware that there had been any implementation of the "Zones". Wow, again. The second thing that came back to me when the aforementioned masseuse said, "In the Zone," was that the so-called Patpong Entertainment Zone covers a lot of territory in addition to just Patpong 1 and Patpong 2. As mentioned in this column two months ago, it is comprised of the "island" formed by Suriwong Rd, Rama IV Rd, Silom Rd and Dejo Road. This is a fairly large area, to include Night Entertainment Areas in Silom Soi 2 and Soi Katoey, and Soi Ginza (Soi Thaniya). Most of the venues in the Patpong Entertainment Zone are not, however, in the Night Entertainment game. But it begs the question, why have we not seen the details on Bangkok's three Night Entertainment Zones' boundaries published officially, in the Press or elsewhere? More important, though, than any survey of mine among friends and fellow night crawlers would be a late night survey of all of the Expat Night Entertainment Areas in Bangkok to see just how the Zone implementation was going down in practice. MIDNITE HOUR decided it would be most interesting to start with non-Zone Entertainment Areas, and save the Patpong Night Entertainment Zone for last, now that it alone was supposed to have the luxury of being the only Expat area still closing at 02:00a.m. We found that although the Zone Implementation started off with all parties taking it very seriously, it was put to the test day by day, night by night, by the individual Night Entertainment Venue owners. At April's end, bar owners in each respective Night Entertainment Area had pushed the envelope as much as they dared, determining just how much the law would allow. This is what we found:-
(...continued below...)
As you may have correctly assumed, once the Night Market commences its close-down routine, it becomes, literally, a no-man's land for customers. Riggers throwing plywood sheets, forklifts speeding down too-narrow lanes and piles of goods and construction materials being thrown noisily onto the footpaths. Very few expats were willing to enter Patpong Road, most were observed turning away to go to McDonalds, or somewhere further down the road. Although many of the bars had closed early, the few bars that remained open were doing so only for form's sake - some bars had, at a maximum, three or four customers nursing a last drink, usually there were none. The A-Go-Go girls had already changed into street clothes in most of the bars, and were occasionally on stage, sometimes with the dek serbs, shuffling back and forth - playing at it. Some bars had already shut their D.J.s down for the night and switched on the house lights. It was as if a cruel joke had been perpetuated on the once illustrious Patpong. They had been bestowed the special status of 'Zonehood' - and it meant absolutely nothing; they too, were effectively neutralized at 01:00 a.m. - not by official zeal, but by reckless riggers the almost unanimously rude Night Market stall owners. The irony deepens when one considers that with very few exceptions, all the other Night Entertainment Areas outside the Zone were staying open -to a greater or lesser extent- until 02:00 a.m. "In the Zone", indeed. Nevertheless, without question or debate, April's patchwork implementation of the Night Entertainment Zones represents the biggest step yet by the Autocracy in it's zealous pursuit of being seen to be doing good. In this case, the "good" is being brought about by a complex public dance to first, create the perception that the modesty of the nation's social fabric has been outraged, and then demonstrate how they came to it's rescue. It matters little that they took two years to do it and that, for the time being, it is only a partial implementation. It matters little that they have repeatedly embarrassed themselves with an unending parade of inept clowns and baboons, many of whom were prominent government ministers. It matters not that they backtracked, and watered-down and compromised their original plan many times over. It matters not that they made more 'mid-course corrections' than the Mars lander. All of that is now behind them, a major milestone in the Crackdown has been reached, however low key, however quietly. Few proprietors in the Night Entertainment Industry have any illusions about the willingness of the Autocracy to undo them completely if they think it will show the Autocracy in a better light, and if they think they can get away with it. The fact that they will further destroy the country's tourism and usher in Western style unmonitored prostitution has never phased the Autocracy one whit.
 Follies begin hereMIDNITE HOUR presents the NEWS on the Bangkok Night Scene; - the 'history-in-the-making' for all major Night Entertainment Areas - for the month ending 1 MAY, 2004 :  MAP 
We don't know if this is the 'norm' for them, but Radio City was rocking and rolling straight through to 02:30 a.m. the other night. The live band kept folks toe-tapping well past the Zone closing time, but the authorities were turning a blind eye. If nothing else, this confirms that the arbitrary closing times currently in effect could be extended to the benefit of both tourists and tourism. A less obtuse, less autocratic government, I'm sure, would capitalize on this simple fact. Rumors to the effect that the upstairs Lucifer Disko Tk and the King's Lounge Disco down the way were indulging in after-hours delights proved groundless, however.
Closed for one month in July 2001, the Supergirls upstairs A-Go-Go show bar had done a quickie renovation and had come back with a vengeance. But it closed again in August 2003, apparently yet another victim of the Crackdown and ever encroaching Night Market. In December of that year, it opened again - but with the "show" scene so severely hobbled by the Autocratic regime's Benevolent Moral Guardians, it seemed a shadow of it's former self. Nevertheless, it hung on until March of this year before closing its doors once again. It opened again, to everyone's amazement, this April. Anyone putting book on how long it stays open this time? Nevertheless, if for no other reason than Supergirls' colorful past, we wish them constancy. • PATPONG I •
MAP
Opening as advertised on 3 April, Club Electric Blue put on the dog with introductory 50 baht drinks, and dek-serbs in pert Spartan-warrior cheerleader kit. A large number of friends, well-wishers and the just-plain-curious came by for opening night festivities. Advertising 50 dancers, I saw twenty-five, working in two shifts - the newly painted rap samak duan sign just outside the front door encouraging the remaining 25 to come in and go to work for a good salary.
But that's the end of the good news. Like Mae Nak descending from the darkened beams in the ceiling, the hoary ghost of the Rififi paid them an ominous visitation one week later, exacting her own sweet revenge. Eager to 'protect & serve', Bang Rak's Men In Tan came a-knocking, advising that if they wanted to open under the legally registered name of "Rififi" they were welcome to keep on keeping on full-throttle. Otherwise, however, they would be required to close until such time as the name was officially changed. Just a matter of paperwork and 50,000 baht, which is the new official gouge for such services. 'Oh, and by the way, you can't register as "Club" Electric Blue, as that is someone else's legal name, so while you are getting ready to reopen, tear the "Club" part of your sign down.' According to sources on the ground here, the owners were rushing to reopen as just plain "Electric Blue" by the end of this April, but apparently the cash exorcism of the Rififi ghost was not successful, and its entrapped and tormented soul is not yet free to wander... • PATPONG II • MAP
The Playskool A-Go-Go, gutted by fire in the closing days of March had hoped to complete renovations in time to open by the first of May. Alas, the Songkran holidays did what they do best - empty out Bangkok - inclusive of all Isarn carpenters and electricians. We had a peek inside last night, and the latest estimate for the reopening - 15 May - is a 'best possible scenario'. There's still a lot of work to do. • NANA PLAZA •
MAP
The bar abuilding these last two months between the Cowboy 1 & 2 bars is the Spice Girls. Construction proceeded reasonably rapidly considering the Songkran holidays, however they are not quite going to make it. I stuck my head in last night, and although the A-Go-Go lighting was on, and it looked complete, the owners said they would be opening this Tuesday, 4 May.
• SOI COWBOY •
The Apache have been naughty girls - Bangkok's Finest, this time from Thonglor, have recently dispensed some extra-judicial street justice in the form of an arbitrary two-week holiday. This, presumably to allow them adequate time to contemplate their inappropriateness. The manageress, unfortunately, shed more heat than light on the problem, as she was still seething when I asked her for details - something about corrupt policemen - if you can believe that !
• SOI COWBOY •
MAP
The Richiy Bar bar beer, and the Richiy Bar Pool will be closed for a week or so, while they re-concrete their floor and make a few other modifications. Look for them to be back open by mid-month.
• COWBOY ANNEX •
The Fantacy bar beer, in what's left of the 4-Pak, hasn't so much closed its doors as it has just withered away. The sign remains, but that's about all. Greener pastures, guys and girls...
• COWBOY ANNEX •
Spanky's Bar 2, likewise of the crumbling 4-Pak, has been quietly absorbed back into Spanky's Bar 1, just two doors down, so it's not really 'goodbye', it's 'see you around'.
• COWBOY ANNEX •
Honey Bar, the last soldier standing in the now derelict 4-Pak, must have had experience in selling refrigerators to Eskimos. Before heading for higher ground, they sold the remainder of their lease to a new, if somewhat masochistic, 'owner'.
• COWBOY ANNEX •
The new bar beer opening in the 4-Pak where the Honey Bar once stood is called the Tuk Tuk Bar. Imagine an almost entirely empty area about the size of Soi Cowboy which could only be entered by threading your way through yet another maze of beer bars and finally through a bottle-necked lane. Imagine that in that huge compound, there are only two pool bars, an Internet cafe and one bar beer. This is all that is left of the Asoke Corner half of the Cowboy Annex, which only a year ago had 33 jumping bars. The night I was there, there were no customers. Why anyone would start up a brand new bar beer in this area is beyond current theoretical physics to figure out. But we extend our best wishes and welcome you to this vale of tears just the same.
• COWBOY ANNEX •
MAP
Opening exactly ninety days after being busted for lewdness and alleged prostitution, The Cave show bar has switched its neon sign back on. Just to make sure the management knew they were paying attention, Bangkok's Finest immediately paid them an evening courtesy visit, red lights all asworl, ostensibly to insure that the soft-kink and the S&M were all just 'shows'. Shake it, don't break it, guys, because, yes, they are going to keep a close watch on you. • SOI DEAD ARTISTS •
MAP
The Noi Bar Pool have rolled the roller-shutter up, dusted things off and hung out their brand new neon shingle. They are a reincarnation of the Species Bar, which folded in November of last year after a four-year run at it. Luck be theirs as they make their maiden sortie into a rather dark nightworld. • TOBACCO RD (Soi 0) •
MAP
The bar abuilding for the last two months, the one with the big sign saying they were "Opening In March", finally did - on 30 April. But the new XantraX was only letting friends of the family in for their very "soft" opening. The rest of us will have to wait for the grand opening next week. Very well appointed, and minimally lit, someone invested a lot of money to make the XantraX an attraction. It sits on the old Velvet digs, which cashed in its chips in February of this year. Welcome to the sideshow.
• SOI KATOEY •
MAP
Things are moving so swiftly at Easy Square, it's a little hard to follow if you are not a full time observer. However one of the good things that has happened is the opening of the Mam & Mam Bar Beer at the back of the compound. Business being a little sparse in the low season, they have yet to accumulate a staff of hostesses. We nevertheless wish them luck as they make their lunge for the brass ring.
• EASY SQUARE •
Next door, the D & D Bar have also just hung their sign out to glow. The 'D's are for Dao and Dan, Dao being the front person. Also short on staff, friends have come by to help out and to give them some face-validity until such time as they get a 'working' crew. May the capricious night-gods see things your way (at least most of the time).
• EASY SQUARE •
The tiny TL Bar has put up a new sign and is now calling itself the Apisara. Still just as tiny, it seems to always have a few customers.
• EASY SQUARE •
Frenchman Ludo Ludvig's dream of becoming a martial arts mogul has taken a king-hit, and may be down for the count. Citing money and other problems, the fledgling two-month old 22 Square Boxing Arena, which, at this juncture consists of exactly one boxing ring in an open field, is gathering dust at an accelerated rate. This once again confirms MIDNITE HOUR's frequently stated conviction that boxing and bars just don't mix - the trail of failed boxing rings at Clinton Plaza (twice), Sukhumvit Square, and Cowboy Annex (twice) provides a fairly good indicator. But before we get to patting ourselves on the back and telling the rest of the world, "I told you so," see the item below...
• EASY SQUARE •
Calling itself just plain Easy Square Muay Thai, a second muay-thai boxing ring has opened up behind a walled off area next to the Ni Hong Kai Japanese restaurant. This time, the owner is not a greenhorn ferang, he is a local with, or so people on the ground are saying, experience as a fight promoter. They are currently scheduling muay thai bouts on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, and the ticket price of 350 baht per person includes one beer and one Pepsi. Frankly, this does not sound like a healthy development in terms of Night Entertainment. We hope we are wrong, and we hope this is not the beginning of the nak-leng meddling and drunken brawling which has accompanied the previous attempts to establish boxing rings in bar areas, but we cannot, of course, guarantee it. Nevertheless we (think we) welcome them to the night games.
• EASY SQUARE •
A brand new bar, yet to be named has opened up just behind Nice Bar in the new section. On 30 April, the party balloons and eats were out for all to enjoy, and a mix of ferang and locals was seen to be doing just that. They think they might, maybe, get around to putting up a sign in the coming weeks, but last night, as the Mekhong flowed freely over an abundance of ice cubes, they were in no mood to discuss it. Welcome to the night circus.
• EASY SQUARE •
The Grim Reaper has drawn the shroud over the Friend Ship pool bar at the back. It's too bad they couldn't have held on a little longer, it looks like Easy Square is starting to pick up a little. Even so, Easy Square has yet to hit that elusive "critical mass" - it still has a way to go before it will have that 'look-and-feel' of a fully fledged Night Entertainment Area.
• EASY SQUARE •
MAP
. The No ! Bra bar beer, Queen's Park Plaza's seminal bar, is closed for renovations - again. Having completed their last top-to-bottom overhaul in October of '02, they seem to think another major sprucing up is necessary. If the last several months are any indication, look for it to have a high percentage of nearly anatomically correct 'hostesses'. Earlier in the month, I spoke with the mamasan, and she thought the No ! Bra would be reopening at the end of the month - well, it's the end of the month and they are not quite there. They will likely roll up the shutters and roll out the red carpet sometime this coming week.
• QUEEN'S PARK PLAZA •
MAP
MAP
--- Datzit Fernow
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